Geese

Monday I told myself that when the beta results came back I would either jump for joy and tell everyone I know that I'm pregnant, or get a giant cup of coffee and go out to sushi.

Well, Monday afternoon the nurse called and said, "Congratulations! You're pregnant!"

I didn't react like I thought I would. I called my Mom, Ciara, Carroll and my husband and was elated to give them the news. Almost incoherent to my Mom. (She's such a patient lady with me) But after every excited giggle, I would stress that this test is not the last. That a second beta would follow on Wednesday, and that the beta would have to double for this pregnancy to be considered viable. And then I added that even after the two beta's, it's not a real deal thing until the heartbeat is seen in two weeks.

And then, to my surprise, I clammed up. I didn't want to tell anyone. Not a soul. What if it's ectopic? What is it's not viable? The less I talk about it the better.

I don't think I believe in lucky charms or omens. But I notice how every time I have something big deal going on in my life, a formation of geese fly really low over my head. I try to rationalize that it's time for birds to migrate north, but I still just know that those geese are there for me.

I'll let you all know the results f the 2nd beta as soon as the nurse calls this afternoon.